venting....

I am supposed to be working right now. But I am watching the bread we just made bake in the oven while the kids are at recess and need to unload.

I take on too much. It is a bad habit of mine, as well as an old one. Ever since I was young (like Middle School age) I have tried to do it all. Sorry. I have gotten better at saying no. I have even gotten good at delegating. Except when I am a committee of one.

Which brings me to my problem. I had hoped for a partner in life. A helpmate. Someone to tell me everything will be fine; someone to give me a boost when it isn't going fine. You can probably guess that is NOT what I got. You cannot tell these things before you say "I do". You really can't. Add two children (one who is like 4 kids all by herself) to the mix and you get one stressed out person. And one who watches TV, plays with his Android or just lays there as the walls come crashing down. I get that there are times I need to ASK for help; but for Pete's sake..... doesn't it also seem that one can look at me and see the struggle. Get up off the couch and just GIVE of yourself?

Thanks- I needed that. I do love my family very much, but there are some days that I just need a partner.

**UPDATE**- after my rant/vent the husband actually sent me two messages asking if he could do anything to help me with the work I needed to do. And he made dinner tonight- thanks, dear!